In
the year 2008 I embarked on a strange, sometimes threatening, yet
always inspiring voyage of discovery.
It
began , fittingly enough, beside the sea. It was the end of a long
forth of july weekend and I and several male acquaintances were
sitting on a deck at a house in Narraganset having drinks My wife
had taken our two daughters into into town for gourmet ice cream. My
editor and erstwhile employer was there and I was slightly on edge
because I knew that he would soon be giving me my next assignment
and at the time was beginning to feel that his constant focus on the
private lives of stars, while making the magazine a lot of money was
not doing my literary reputation much good.
The
wives were not in sight. They had apparently wandered off somewhere
and Charles, an acquaintance that had something to do with Purdue
University and was not of the first caliber intellectually said
“Ever
want go to go out for cigarettes and not come back?
The
consensus seemed to be that no one present had even considered the
notion. The silence that followed the question however indicated that
in fact the idea had at least been considered.
Carl Sturgeon,
the eminent black social theorist, as usual, brought us back to the world of the
living.
“You
might want to look at it another way. My friend the psychoanalyst
never seems to tire of telling me about female patients that are
obsessed with having a dozen lovers or more even”
“That's
why they're on the couch!” shouted Tom Maxwell the television
sports announcer, who had had plenty to drink.
“Monogamy
is a comparatively recent innovation.” Said Lewis Vanderfield, a
WASP who never hesitated to let people know it. Then he added the
kicker, “Especially among your people Carl, right?.”
After
a pause Sturgeon asked“Which people do you refer to, the successful
writers or the homosexuals?
That
was a bit of a low blow. Lewis had recently been introducing the
notion of his marriage to a long time partner and had not been
particularly encouraged by the men with conventional families. Carl was to all appearances happily married to a white woman. It drove some of the white fellows crazy, and he knew it and enjoyed it
My
editor, never one to miss the opportunity to mention money said
“Well a lot of the one parent homes in black families have to be
attributed to economic factors.”
Timothy,
an Irish fellow who was known to prefer black women interjected,
“Either that or they ust live to fuck”
Mr
Analytical, your's truly, could not help but say.
“That
seems provable or disprovable but to me it seems l;ike expediency.
If there's no chance of a long term commitment one settles for a
short term commitment.”
Sturgeon suggested,
“Not
to destroy any illusions, but women in the underclass are always
characterized as “hot to trot.” Consider the fiery Spanish
fireballs, and southern European women in general. There may just be
black women that are more focused on providing for their families
because they know if they don't do it no one will.
Charles
returned to the conversation.
“I
kinda fancy the notion of a dozen different lovers at the same time.”
The
Irishman said, You know the one about the bull and the cow. A man
and his wife are looking at a bull and a cow and the wife says ,
“You know a bull can ejaculate as many as two dozen times a day,
and the husband replies, “Yeah, but it's not always with the same
cow!”
Even
with the lubricants this crowd did not roar with laughter, but the
point of the humor was well taken. I looked at my watch. It was
almost four. Out on the bay before us the amateur sailors had gone
in leaving the open waters to the better ones who were taking
advantage of the late day increase in breeze.
Gary,
who had been so far silent spoke up. It was good to hear his voice
again. He had gone through a long troubling relationship with a wife
that had not been forthcoming about her affair with her employer and
indeed had gone so far as to accuse Gary of wife abuse, a heinous
crime.
If
the woman or man walks out that's nothing. It's a clean break. A lot
of times it dudn't happen that way though. You know you keep
thinking you're going to get back together with her and you wonder
what it is you done wrong.”
“Oh
Christ,” whispered Timmy.
Gary
went on, in a world of his own. It was generally thought that Gary
was a nice enough guy, but he kept looking for reasons where there
were no reasons.
“It's
just the way the big boy made people, you know.” said Lewis, who
could show compassion sometimes, despite being a Wasp.
“She
was a bitch, plain and simple” said Timmy.
“Then
why did I love her? Why did I love a bitch? Why didn't I find a nice
girl to marry?”
It
was at that point that I came to a realization. The story of the
tender loving wife, who stays with her man despite physical and
mental abuse , is familiar. Could it not work the other way around?
Gary
was a giver. He is, as the expression goes, someone who would give
you the shirt off his back. Jessica was a taker. She'd take the
shirt of your back and then ask for the shoes and socks too. They
lasted as a couple then, only as long as their two neurotic adaptions
fit together – that is to say, until Gary ran out of new things to
give Jessica
“Well
eventually she walked out on you, right? Someone asked.
“She
left me for a bartender – for a fucking bartender”
Actually
the bartender was three or four boyfriends ago and the last I heard
she had worked her way out to a condominium salesman, but it was
plain, she wasn't coming back. Gary was a tapped out mine – a
saturated market – an emotional ghostown haunted by the shadows of
people long gone.
My
editor tapped me on the shoulder and motioned to me that we take a
walk. When we got to the hedge that lead to the stairway that led
down to the beach. He began to speak.
“Got
an assignment for you. My contacts assure me that the economies gblow,
or actually it's already started but it's going to keep crashing for
the foreseeable future. I began to feel a cold chill down my spine.
“I'm
not following” I said. But I was. And if there's anything worse
then sucking up to the rick it's suck down to the poor, but he had
his mind made up.
“Poor
like me” he said- “You go underground and write a sob story about
the abused but honest, the trod upon but noble,poor. We'll make a
fucking boatload of money. You do like Dicken's- play off the guilt
complexes of the rich. They know they are to blame but they sure as
shit aren't going to make things right so you write a story that says
they are not to blame and even if they were to blame the poor like
being poor because it build , uhh”
“Moral
Character?”I said
“Absolutely”
he said
“What
about my family, my wife, my house, my dog?”
“We're
,making a virtue out of a vice.”
“What
is that supposed to mean?”
“What
does it sound like?”
“You're
going to want to talk to you wife.”
“What
the fuck does she have to do with this?”
“A
lot. Look John, you have a lot of questions and frankly I can't
answer them. In time the answers will come. I guarantee that, but
for now you're going to have to put your head down and get on with
the job at hand. I worked out this deal in part to keep your wife
happy, because she still has strong feelings for you, even if she
doesn’t think the marriage is working out.”
“What
are you talking about? What the fuck are you talking about? The
marriage was working yesterday and now it's not working today?”
“John
you might as well hear it from me, but your marriage was not working
yesterday. Truth is me and Maureen have been lovers for about a
year. She was not happy and she came to me.”
“You
son of a bitch... a year?”
“Stay
calm Johnny. Truth is there were others as well. One night stands,
things like that. I mean, I care for at least and I hope we can
stay friends.”
“Stay
friends? How about I get a gun and blow your fucking head off –
then we can stay friends”
“It
won't bring her back. She's gone boyo. I've kept you on out of, I
don't know, sympathy, I guess and that's why if you come to me with
something I can sell in a few months or a year I promise you I will
do my best to make a deal somewhere.”
“How
about my wife, can you make a deal for her? Is she included in the
bargain?”
“Maureen
makes her own deals. You know that.”
I
once again looked out at the reggatta and said the obvious,
“I
can't believe this is real.”
“John,
believe me, this is all going to work out for the best because right
now you have other problems to take care of and you could do without
a messy family situation.”
“No
Eric, I could do with a messy family situation. Did you ever hear the
words, for better or worse, in sickness and health for richer or
poorer.”
He
didn't say anything . He just smiled that smile that I'd seen
before in other situations, but never so creul. He had gotten the
better of me. He talked her out of marriage, or bribed her or
something. Part of me couldn't accept what he said but another part
of me knew damn well the game was over. He was so confident and from
here on he would have as little to do with me as possible.
He
was right about one thing though. The next few months were busy. I
began to realize I had many new friends . Friends like the Bank of
America, Chase, AT&T and other smaller friends. They were all
willing to work with me to pay off my debt – no matter how long it
took and foolishly as it turned out, I trusted them. I went from a
five hundred thousand dollar credit line to virtually nothing in six
months. Each time I'd make a payment, trying to get accounts in
order, they would tighten the noose making it more difficult.
Try
though I may, I looked through the papers but sow no jobs for men
with post graduate degrees in Ancient Irish literature and a minor
in history. There were bright spots, but not many. I'd been reduced
to going to local libraries to use the facilities and in one I saw
something that warmed my heart.
He
was about six foot two an had a square jaw and a perfect physique.
His face was unmarked by any imbalance or deformity. It may have
been Anatole France (who was a fine writer despite having one of the
smallest brains ever measured) who made reference to a person who
had everything going for himself except one thng; “Those social
graces that open all doors.” Here was a fellow that obviously had
those social graces, as long as he didn't open his mouth.
He
was without question, “executive material”such as I have seen in
a hundred boardrooms in a thousand magazine articles and by the
millions walking the canyons of Wall Street. His clothing, his
shoes, his haircuts even – everything reeked class. The fact that
he had not a brain in his head would not defer Pepsi Cola or Nabisoc
from naming him CEO.
Oh,
thou blond god! Thee of perfect teeth, had I but a tenth of your
social graces I could count myself fortunate. And yet , everyday,
there he was in the library, with a stack of business cards and a
stack of resumes sending them out by the dozen and hundreds because
you see - the people receiving the resumes had no idea of what a
good impression he made. He would have been better served had he sent
a nude photo of himself lifting a silicone enhanced babe over his
head and smiling his best Ronnie Reagan smile.
Misery
indeed does love company. Are
you miserable? Let me keep you company. I'm good at it. Do you know
the story of the whore? She's meeting a client for the first time and
says “If you want a nun or a schoolgirl it's fifty bucks extra
but if you want me at my best it's regular price.”
You
see, with people who are happy I cannot relate. You give me a
heartbroken loser who had seen his world turn to garbage and them I
can get along with. Heroes don't need me. Winners don't need me.
As
to the mysterious journey into the world of the poor. Well that was
just a come one, a lead in, a con job, a way of getting your
attention. Could I write a book about it? Are you could kidding?
Certainly.
Consider
this. Its something cops know and use. I'm in the town of New Paltz
which is a college town just upstate new york. A lot of the locals
are not widely traveled and what is more the school tends to draw
more then it's fair share adults who are fond of children. Mostly
its an innocent exploitation but naturally they are very sensitive
as to the topic.
One
such chap who owned a store catering to children also rented rooms
and I went several times to try to rent a room from him. After awhile
it became apparent that it was a no go – which didn't bother me so
much as the fact that he could not bring himself to fabricate some
sort of excuse.
A
similar case happened with a married woman friend of mine. I was
willing to leave her alone but another man, married , wanted to get
in her pants – so the problem was I was basically in the way. It's
a problem I have – the last thing a criminal wants is a cop on the
scene so they have to create some cause to get rid of that obstacle.
I
could tell when this was happening and ordinarily, even if it is
against the law I will let it pass. This is not a perfect world and
besides a suspicion is not evidence. You may have heard about my
nemesis in the form of the small town librarians. Well, after
confronting their kiddie toy owner and getting effectively blown off
I enter the library and say“Anybody got any hot fourteenyear old
boy's?”or something to that effect. After seeing me for three
years nearly everyday you would think they'd cutme some slack, but no
– they had conniptions and agreed among themselves that I was sick
and they were right to feel disgusted. They must have decided I was
some sicko at least a dozen times, but who’s counting?
I
never got to finish the joke either, It's when I rub my hands
together and say “hmmm, saucy!”
By
the way I don't really think the people in the library are child
molesters – but they are very sensitive to the accusation and I
apologize for making it known.
So
anyway what this comes down to is if you really are something,
something you don't really want to be, one way or another you want to
be as far away from it as possible. A girl who has been assulted by
her father or older brother will try to block the memory of the
attack out for the rest of her life.
So
yes, I have been poor, gone hungry gone homeless even – but you
what ? I don't want to talk about it. The wound is still too fresh
But
so I don't be accused of misleading the dear reader I will give you
two things you might want ot know about poverty in fact I am
thinking of starting a new TV Show called “Poverty – American
Style!” (I suppose I'll start right after I begin the show about
pedophilia and before I begin airing games from the transexual
tennis league.
Actually
(Hello Alan) one of my childhood pals grew up to be gay and now lives
in frisco where he had a male partner in a doubles ice skating
contest – the contest said it was no good and got taken to court
which overruled the verdict and now there's male doubles in ice
skating.
But
back to poverty American style – this is how it's done, a escribed by a Nobel prize winner in the book the Bell Curve (which is hated
more then it ought to be) The problem in the US is how to keep the
poor from killing the rich. It's an old problem and the largest
prison system on earth only goes part of the way towards solving it.
As
in the middle ages we know effectively lock up the rich in the
equivalent of self sufficient manor systems which we called gated
communities. In those areas where estates predominate we make sure
there are plenty of police. This only solves half the problem which
is how to protect the rich.
The
second problem is how to castrate the poor and this is done via
poverty zones. In this case what we do is we place all the services
need by the poor ( who are defined by their lack of income) in a
certain city or area which is far away from the wealth zones. So in
the same locale you will find the second hand clothing stores, the
food stamps distributes, the drug and alcohol rehab centers, the low
income housing and the prisons. This means that all the things
needed for survival are located within walking distance of one
another and by placing these zones in comparatively out of the way
places there is no need to place fences around them.
It's
worth mentioning that this principle is also applied to entertainment
centers, which, being the exclusive province of the wealthy are place
in out of the way places like the mountains of Pennsylvania or even
Florida, rather then as was the case in the past, the river side or
ocean side of a major city – where the poor would have access.
And
finally as the paper of record (the NY times) never seems to tire of
reminding us the notion that one gains value as one gains
experience in a job is overturned in Poverty-American Style!
(Trademark 2013) In the European model, which has developed over
several centuries, manufacturing includes a trade union system which
in turn allocates position and pay scales to apprentices and master
craftsman. The US has since Reagan , effectively destroyed centuries
of the collective bargaining modality buy adopting a Southern
Paradigm which is based on the slave system.
In
the new slave state as a person weakens physically they
employability also deteriorates. People in peak employment ages are
forced to work long hours at low wages but then mistakenly often
believe that they will see salaries increase instead , there being no
workers protection laws, they are often fired as soon as their income
rises above a certain level.
An
amusing side note to this issue is the suggestion made by Former
President William Clinton who said in effect that the loss of
quality employment was something that had to be accepted and that the
modern worker was to compensate for this by seeking employment in
two or tree different occupations over the course of a working
lifetime. As far as we know no one has ever taking that suggestion
seriously – beginning with the former president, who successfully
negated all attempts to make him change his employment.
The
devil may be in the details but m,any a battle is won in the
generalities (pardon the pun) Which is to say that smile minded
bigots with lynch mobs and over active police may not present a
pretty picture but they are effective in convincing people that they
are not wanted and that it would better for them if they were not
to “let the sun go down on them.” We are seeing that more and
more as poverty become entrenched in the American Psyche.
Poverty
can be viewed as a disease. Like being exposed to a carcinogen the
effect of periods of poverty can sometimes not be seen for decades.
There were until recently many people who's outlooks were shaped by
the depression of the 30's.
To
conclude with some thoughts from my days as a research analyst in
Criminal justice, I was able to study the amount and types of crimes
committed in Long lsland, at the time fairly well to do, in the wake
of several mini- recessions; recessions that hit individual cities
and towns hard, as in the case when a major industry like Grummen
Aeronautics shut down.
Essentially
the crimes went from targets of immediate opportunity to gradually
more severe crimes and what it more they grew move violent over time.
There was as constant correlation between the onset of poverty and
violence. It is not unfair then to suggest that this will occur on a
national scale. Then again I would not wish to underestimate the a
mont of pain humans can withstand prior to rebelling.
– Tamlin